5 Tips For Building Trust in Relationships
It makes sense that trust is such an important aspect of keeping a relationship healthy. Most couples will say that this is something they are looking for in their relationship, and when trust is broken, this can cause fractures in the relationship that can be difficult to mend.
What is trust?
Trust is the ability to lean on your partner, and know that they will show up for you. Trust means that you can rely on your partner because you feel safe with them and have confidence in their ability to be there when you need them and know that they will do their best to support you. Trust allows two people to be vulnerable with each other, stay open, and work on managing defensive reactions to protect themselves.
How to build trust in a relationship
Honesty
Being honest with your partner about how you are feeling in your relationship is key to building trust. If your partner cannot count on you, to be honest, they will not know that you are struggling and will be unable to show support in your relationship. This can lead to negative cycles in a relationship, as resentment can build when couples hold back what they need or feel.
2. Accountability
Being accountable when you make a mistake, don’t show up in the right way for your partner, or when you are reactive instead of empathetic to honest emotion. When a person is accountable in their relationship with their partner, this opens up the ability to make amends and trust their partner that they are not trying to “win” the argument, which leads to a more at ease feeling knowing that it’s okay to make mistakes, as long as we recognize them.
3. Transparency
Being transparent with your partner means that you show your vulnerable side, show when you feel hurt, and even when you think you “shouldn’t” feel that way about a situation. Your partner will not be able to know that you are hurt unless you are transparent about your experience. I know sometimes when the relationship has been long-standing, we may expect our partner “to just know” how we feel without saying anything. This is a negative trap to be aware of, and it is always important to practice being transparent to build trust.
4. Proof of alliance
Showing that you are your partner’s teammate, and always working to protect them is important for trust to build. This may mean standing up for them in times of conflict with others, and not talking bad about your partner when they are not around.
5. Seeing someone as “good”
It can be easy to focus on your partner’s flaws when you are feeling irritable and not getting your needs met. Working on shifting your mindset into seeing your partner as “good” and acknowledging the healthy aspects of your partner is important to focus on the positive. Making sure to voice the positive aspects to your partner when they do well or support you in the way you need will help your relationship improve on trust.
Relationships are not perfect, and there will be times when trust is broken, even in healthy relationships. Using these tips can help relationships navigate hard times and build back trust after it has been broken. Although, there needs to be honest and open communication, in a vulnerable manner, to build that trust back.
Begin Working with a Relationship Therapist in Colorado and Arizona
You deserve support in finding a deeper level of trust in your relationship. I would be happy to help you cultivate connection and understanding! You don’t have to navigate this alone If you are looking to start relationship therapy with Aspen Grove Counseling, contact me today!
